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A Hostile Work Environment for Men
September 23, 2003
by Carey Roberts

We've all heard how men in the workplace tend to be hierachical, controlling, and power-hungry.

But what about women? Now that women have established their presence in the workplace for over a decade, it's time to ask whether they have fulfilled the promise of making the office a "kinder, gentler" place to spend 40 hours every week.

First, we need to dispense with the myth that women react to situations the same as men. If you believe that chestnut, then take a mouse to work tomorrow morning and let it loose. Observe which of your co-workers perch themselves on the tops of their chairs.

Over the many years of my career, I have observed that most women have a Hurt Feelings Memory Bank. This Memory Bank has the uncanny ability to indelibly record every odd comment that co-workers make, and to recall this incident in perfect detail many years later.

That comment you made last year about Mary's slacks fitting too tight -- you probably forgot about that remark long ago, but Mary's Hurt Feelings Memory Bank has tallied, inventoried, and stored that comment in its vault.

Afterwards, you can say 100 nice things to Mary, but that one comment about the tight slacks will never be forgotten or forgiven.

Indeed, any effort by the man to explain the comment may be interpreted as Insensitivity to the Feelings of Women. This is a grievous insult, which is of course tallied as a new entry in the ledger.

Whereas a man's Hurt Feelings Memory Bank may lapse due to inactivity, a woman's Memory Bank is a high volume account. The same memory may be withdrawn and redeposited many times in the same day.

Part of the Female Bonding Ritual is to compare and analyze the contents of their Hurt Feelings Memory Bank with other women.

During the bonding process, the emotions become further embellished. Soon, the emotions begin to color and crowd out the actual facts of the situation.

If a man happens to be their supervisor, one of the gals may make the off-hand comment that he "treats his female employees differently." Employers are now required to act even on the suspicion of gender discrimination. As a result, the allegation alone becomes a sufficient basis to take punitive action against the male supervisor.

A few months ago, Alessandra Eakin wrote an article on "Using Emotion as Ammunition" in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Ms. Eakin describes how some women use emotional extortion to achieve their aims: "Pouting over hurt feelings, throwing temper tantrums and hurling accusations of meanness gets you what you want....Simply put, women have run amok. Men are losing their ground as they endure blatant abuse by women day after day, decade after decade....Somebody please, stop these women before they ruin our lives."

But men aren't the only ones who are victimized by emotional blackmail tactics.

It used to be that most women were able to keep their Hurt Feelings Memory Bank in close check. But radical feminism has succeeded in convincing women that they are victims of the male conspiracy which they darkly call "the patriarchy."

This victim message has been repeated so many times that the Hurt Feelings Memory Bank of some women now predominates over their Factual Knowlege Logic Board. So these women, who could potentially be a force for compassion and understanding in the workforce, have instead become spiteful and vindictive.

That's what radical feminism has done to gender relationships in the workplace.

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